


I said I love you but I lied.

by EA_sports



Category: Presston, USWNT - Fandom
Genre: F/F
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-06-09
Updated: 2017-05-06
Packaged: 2018-07-14 00:30:55
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 12,860
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7144838
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/EA_sports/pseuds/EA_sports
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Christen Press is having a hard time forgetting her now Ex- Girlfiend because of how thing ended between them but we don't know the other side of the story and the reasons behind why Julie Johnston has made the decisions she has.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Heyy, hopefully this story catches you eye, sorry for any grammar mistakes I am not really good and writing things in the correct manner, it bores me to be honest, but this story is gonna be good and hopefully you guys enjoy it.  
> Thank you.

It was finally January 4th and there was a bittersweet feeling when Christen thought about what might happen today. It has been a little under 2 months since she has seen her ex-girlfriend Julie and it was killing her. Julie had suddenly broke up with her over text and made it her goal to cut off any contact between each other, it was incredibly hard for Christen to act as if Julie no longer existed but she had to come to terms with the fact that the times Julie had said I love you were all a lie. She couldn't understand what happened that had made Julie dump her all of a sudden and the more she wanted to forget her, the more she thought about her.  
Christen was looking for her first class but had no idea where it was and walked around campus until she finally figured out what building it was in but was still lost. She saw a girl sitting in the media center,  
"Hey, sorry to bother you but I can't find this class, do you think you can help me?"

C"Sure, just take the elevator and go to the 4th floor and it will be there" and Christen felt relived that she finally found it,  
"okay, thank you very much".

She made her way up to class and was right on time, the first day is mainly just talking about the syllabus so she wasn't stressing out or anything,  
"Christen Press?"  
That immediately caught her attention and she answered "here".  
The hour was up and she walked out off class and went down to the 24- hour lab to print out her syllabus for her other class and right when she opened the door she was meet with the blue eyes that she knew were her undoing but she couldn't help but lose herself in them. Seeing her ex wasn't the ideal way to start the spring semester but she snapped out of it and looked elsewhere, but looked again,she couldn't help but explore Julie's face and noticed that Julie was staring right back at her, and just for a moment she thought that Julie was feeling all the emotions that she was and she could feel her heartbeat quicken. It felt as if time had stopped and they were the only two people on earth. Was it possible for someone to become even more attractive??? She didn't know how but Julie's eyes looked a deeper shade of blue, her hair was longer and lighter, and her skin had a glow to it that made her look like an angel. She stopped and looked at her hands, she did not want Julie to realize that she was still totally in love with her because Julie broke her heart and didn't care.  
She took out her phone and wished that when she looked up Julie was gone but when she looked up she realized Julie was still there, staring at her. Christen was now looking at her watch and realized she had to print her paper out now or she wouldn't make it in time for her religion class, which her friends were already texting to her to ask if she was on her way there. She had no other option but to walk in the direction that Julie was in and noticed she was talking to Moe and Kling, she would have said hi to them but had no intention on approaching Julie. She managed to find an empty computer before having to pass them and she has never printed out a paper faster in her life. She sent a group text to Kelley, Pinoe, and Alex and told them that she was almost on her way to class, and then she realized a horrible thing, Julie was waiting for her papers to print from the only printer in the Lab and she has never hated life more than right now. She noticed that Julie was putting her paper in her backpack and Kling was waiting for her last paper to print, she slowly but surely walked over to them and hated to see how Julie would turn to look at her but would look away quickly, she finally stopped behind them. Moe and Kling wasted no time in greeting her,  
"omg christen, Heyyy, how was your well need winter break?" Kling said while hugging her,  
"Hey Kling, I'm good how are you?? I enjoyed break too much, hey Moe how are you??" Christen said while hugging Moe, she was grateful that Julie had taken a few steps back.  
"Hey christen, I'm good too, not that excited to be back at school but I mean that's life" Moe said and the three let out a small laugh, Christen really wanted to grab her paper and go so she made it quick, "Sorry but I'm actually in a rush to get to class, I just need my syllabus, but we have to catch up later, okay??" Christen said while grabbing her paper and putting it in her backpack.  
Moe said, "yeah we understand, we're gonna make our way to class too but we should all have lunch later and definitely tell Krashlyn, Talex, Crystal, Kelley and Pinoe to come too, we've missed our squad over break", and Christen couldn't help but smile at the thought of their reunion,  
"of course I will, it's a good thing we all dorm so we'll find a time we can all meet, but I really have to go, bye" she smiled at them and made her way to religion, trying very hard not to look at Julie.

\--------------------------------------------

"Ughh I can't believe break is over and we're starting a new semester." Julie Johnston said while walking with her best friends, Morgan Brian and Meghan Klingenberg.  
"Believe me, neither Moe nor I are excited but I mean you gotta do what you gotta do"  
Ugghh they all exclaimed while on their way to print their syllabus for their religion class. They decided that Julie would print out 3 and just give one to Moe and Kling, they proceed to wait behind the two girls who were also using the printer, the 3 friends all checked their schedules on their phone so they can get an idea of how their days will look, Julie could hear the door open and close and she knew that a class had been over, she heard the door open and she doesn't know why but something told her to look up and surely when she does, she was meet with the worlds most gorgeous green eyes that belonged to the most gorgeous face, she knew she shouldn't have but she locked eyes with the girl and couldn't bear to look away. Time seemed to have slowed down and all that mattered was the girl who had those eyes. She doesn't know how much time went by but she was brought back by the sound of her best friends calling her name but she couldn't look away, but answered them," yeah, I hear you guys, what do you want??"  
"Wow, no need to get rude but it's your turn to print and stop staring into those gorgeous eyes that make you fall in love". She finally turned her head when she heard her friends laugh," I told you to stop mocking me, I said that a while ago, why won't you forget it, but it's true I mean look at her" Julie said while typing in her information and waiting for her papers to print.  
Kling sighed, "Sorry Julie, we know that's a sensitive topic but you can fix all of this, you know that right?"

" you know I can't, she wouldn't understand and I couldn't drag her into all the chaos that revolves around me" Julie took a moment to look back and realized Christen was now seated and working on the computer and she thought back to what happened moments ago, she definitely thought it was illegal for someone to look that beautiful. Christen never ceased to take her breath away, those green eyes looked even more prominent now that her skin was slightly more tanned but Julie was not complaining. She picked up her paper and told the others to pick their paper up, when she looked up she saw a very nervous Christen approach them ever so slowly and she couldn't help but sneak a few glances at her but when Christen arrived and began to chat with her friends she took a few steps back, she looked at the girl and a million thoughts were running around her mind but the main one was "Did I make the right decision"?? She realized just how much she missed the girl when she took her all in, her hair was slightly longer but not as noticeable because of the curls they were in but she noticed the lighter shade of brown that it was and she loved it, but just as she was going to check out other important body parts she saw the girl turn around and scurry away and she realized that she completely tuned their conversation out.  
She saw fingers snapping and looked at her friends who were giving her a look, "I know, I know, this is all on me,"  
Moe took this as her cue," Come on Julie, we just want to help you, we understand why you did it but we just want you to think about the fact that maybe it wasn't necessary and that you have the opportunity to change it" 

"Let's not do this again okay, come on let's go to class" Julie said while pushing her friends to the door and making their way to their not so exciting religion class.  
They checked their phones while walking and as the arrived to the classroom they all sighed and put their phones away and looked at each other while opening the door to walk inside.  
Julie was the last to enter and stopped in her tracks when she looked to the front row and thought, " Why Jesus? this day could not get worse!"


	2. God is a funny guy.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> What could comes from religion classes?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for any grammatical errors I get inspired and write a whole chapter and don't really like to go over it. Thanks(:hope you enjoy!

"Would you mind sitting down??" The professor startled Julie who was standing in the doorway staring at the people in the first row. "Uhhhh yeah s-sorry I was just uhh n-nothing" Julie rapidly moved to sit with her friends. She opened her backpack and took out the necessary utensils and took a moment to just breathe. How was it possible for her to be stuck in the same class with Christen for the next 4 months. Walking in and immediately locking eyes with her again was a mix of emotions, this was the second time she was staring into them and they seemed to get more beautiful by the second.

She noticed Christen's surprised look and was sure that her expression was the same. She saw Kelley, Pinoe, and Alex sitting with her and immediately saw they all had a scowl while looking at her, but I mean she understood why they were mad at her, she broke their best friends heart. She turned to look at Kling and Moe who were giving her a supportive smile because they knew this was hard. She had no idea why they decided to sit in the row behind them but she figured it was because they're all friends. "Don't look so sad JJ, at least you have Kling and me in the class to cheer you up" Julie was really grateful for that "I know and I want to thank you guys for being there for me these pass months, you guys are the best of friends".  
They all turned to the front of the class to pay attention to the professor, he went over the syllabus and right before class was over, he spoke "I want you guys to look at the paper on the board, it contains the person who you will be paired up with for the remainder of the semester. Any assignment that we have you will do it with this person okay, and your first assignment is to get to know your partner, that is if you don't already know them and write a short paragraph about them and turn it in the next time we meet, alright. have a good rest of your day ladies." 

 

\--------------------------------------------

Christen slowly got up from her seat and couldn't help but glance back at Julie who was putting her stuff in her backpack, she didn't know how to feel about being stuck with her in this class but she shook the thought and moved to the board to see who her partner was, " hopefully it's Pinoe" ......... and she could not believe how unlucky she was, why was the universe conspiring against her, "Jules" she said out loud and turned to look at Julie who eyed her curiously, she didn't feel like talking so she walked out of class with her friends and began to head to the Café to get a snack.   
"Can you guys believe that I'm stuck with Julie as my partner" Christen exclaimed.

" I know what are the odds of that, the rest of us got paired with people we've barely seen around campus, Ugghh" Alex said.

"Breakfast better be good on the first day of class. Kling and Moe agreed to meet up in our dorm at 7 so we can have a sleepover, yaayyyy" Pinoe said while pulling them all into a group hug. 

Christen was excited but the realization hit her that Julie was also part of their squad before and of course Kling and Moe wouldn't want to exclude her from this sleepover. " I know what you're thinking and whatever you want is what we'll we do, okay pressy" Kelley said putting her hand on her shoulder reassuringly. "I'll think about it over breakfast. Come on let's go to the café" they all talked while on their way. 

Walking to the caf she heard the laugh that she'd grown to love but hated so much. It was surprisingly full probably because it was the first day and everyone was trying to catch up with their friends, there were only two tables left and she knew this was not going to end well and of course she was right, but before she could protest, Kling and Pinoe were pushing the tables together so they could all fit. "God loves me doesn't he" christen said sarcastically, "come on press might as well tear the bandage off, you two are bound to be stuck together on many occasions" Alex wanted to make Christen feel a little better. 

She ordered her omelet and grabbed her drink before sitting at her table surrounded by her friends and for exactly 20 seconds it was like old times, when they would all hang out and they couldn't do anything else but laugh at the nonsense that came out of Kling and Pinoe's mouth. But then it happened and she looked into those eyes that had ruined her, everyone was to busy eating so she took this moment and said "I don't know about you guys but I can't wait for our sleepover. I already know how fun it's going to be" she said looking and Julie so that she understood that she accepted the fact that she would be there too. They all spent the next hour laughing and talking about their adventures. Everyone ignored the fact that JJ and Christen's consisted of binge watching Netflix and eating junk food. 

Christen had one more class to get over with then she wanted to practice on her shots a little bit before practices started again. She finished her abnormal psychology class and changed into her soccer attire and began to practice her shots and she loved the fact that she was making all of them, the sight that she saw disturbed her more than it should have.... Julie was walking around with some girl who was laughing way to hard and whatever it was Julie had said. She stopped shooting and put her foot on top of the ball and crossed her arms and stared, she know she shouldn't have but she couldn't shake this ugly feeling in her stomach. She knew that Julie was most likely showing her around campus because Julie is that sweet and compassionate and adorable and humble and Ugghh!! "Shut up" she said to no one.

Julie looked to the soccer field and saw the nasty look on Christen's face and realized that she was probably not happy that the girl was being slight overly friendly but she thought she was overthinking it, I mean Christen doesn't care about me anymore, she decided to leave quickly and show the girl another part of the campus, she took one last look at Christen and saw her throw the ball at the ground and kick it when it came back up and Julie knew that she only did that when she was furious and or jealous but she didn't expect her to be jealous, I mean how could she. 

Christen took an extra long shower and kept replaying the scene she saw and she couldn't get this feeling out her stomach. She started heading back to her dorm and remembered the sleep over and the PEOPLE who would be there. She walked into her dorm and found all of her friends already there, " yo press, finally you show up, you're 40 minutes late, come on sit and let's eat." Pinoe said a little louder than she should have but she understood her excitement. 

"Sorry, I got.. A little caught up wi-with something" she glanced at the person who caused her night to go bad. She looked at the desktop and saw the only thing she craved and immediately put all her stuff on her bed and grabbed them and put them in the middle of the circle and took the biggest gulp even possible, staring at the person who had caused her to feel the most horrible pain possible to human kind.

This was going to be a fun night.......


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry if it feels a little rushed but I'm not a very patient person, so I like things to happen quickly.

This sleepover was going the exact way it shouldn't have. Christen had already had way to many bottles of alcohol and she didn't seem to want to stop anytime soon. Pinoe and Kling were the only ones as drunk as she was and they were really enjoying this side of Christen that they didn't see very often. Alex knew this was going to end well "Tobin, we need to do something. Press will end up doing something that she'll regret" 

"She is obviously very upset about something and by the way she keeps staring at Julie, I'm assuming it has something to do with her" Christen suddenly began shouting in excitement and Pinoe announced that they were going to play Truth or Dare.

"Ashlyn this is a horrible idea, we have to convince them into playing something else, this could get dangerous" Ali said to her girlfriend. "You know she won't listen to us, she's way to drunk and heartbroken. We just need to be there to stop her from doing anything too stupid" Ashlyn said hoping for the best.

They all made a huge circle in the middle of their dorm room made up of ash and Ali, Alex and Tobin, Kling and moe, JJ and Pinoe and Kelley and Christen. 10 people in one dorm is a lot but they're making it work. Christen who was way took excited finished the bottle and set it down and spun it around and it landed on Alex, she wasn't really into this game so just picked truth and they moved on from her. They al took turns until it was Christen's turn again and she spun it and of course it landed on her, she was slightly happy because she's feeling like getting shit off her chest!  
"My my well God is really up for playing games today isn't he Jules" she said smirking at Julie who was shocked and didn't know what was happening but then she heard the three words that she never wanted to hear from Christen's mouth.   
"I hate you!" Those words kept spinning around in her mind, did she really mean it? She looked up into those eyes who held so much power over her, they had many emotions surfacing in them, that she couldn't fully pinpoint what the green eyed girl was truly feeling.   
"I hate you with all that I have, I rue the day I met you, you're the most horrible person I've ever met and I regret everything that we ever had, you don't deserve love!" Tears just kept rolling down Christen's face and everyone was shocked but said nothing. Christen then grabbed the bottle of whiskey and drunk until it burned too much and threw the bottle at the wall.  
She turned to face Julie who had her head in her hands obviously crying, she looked up and they locked eyes. It was a scary gaze between them but Julie couldn't take it and ran out of the dorm and went to the only place she could be in peace. 

"How did a simple fucken sleep over end up like this!!!" JJ thought out loud as she arrived at her spot or 'their' spot but she highly doubts there is an 'us' anymore.

\--------------------------------------------

Everyone was quiet, they had absolutely no idea what to say or what to do. Kelley slowly but surely began to stand and make her way towards Christen who had her hands on the wall and was sobbing, she looked back at her friends who had shock written on their faces. "Pressy, are you okay? I know this was a bad idea, we shouldn't have invited her, I know the wound is still fresh and it was to soon and w-we shouldn't have brought that much alcohol" she tried to pull her into a hug only to be pushed away by a very agitated press. "I have to go" she said and ran out of the dorm leaving her friends in shock and uncertain of what would happen next. "We can all assume where she's heading right?" Alex stood up " should we go look for them??" she began pacing back and forth. "Babe this is long overdue, we're not picking sides" tobin said as she looked at Kling and moe, " but press needs answers and it's time that Julie gives them to her. Let's wait for Press to come back and be here for her when she does". They all began to clean up and help the very drunk Kling back to her dorm with Moe and Pinoe into her bed. They all parted ways and the only people left in the dorm were Kelley and Alex who couldn't get any sleep.

\--------------------------------------------

Press knew she was drunk and didn't understand how she was able to run and function this well. She stopped when she realized she had no idea where she was going but it clicked before is was 'their' place it was 'hers' first and immediately she was running there. She heard crying and knew she was there, she slowed down and took a deeeeeep breath and weirdly she wasn't as drunk anymore. She approached that place and saw her with her feet crossed and head in her hands, she's suddenly nervous but before she can think she's sitting next to her.  
It feels like 10 minutes have gone by until Julie breaks the silence, "why would you let me come to this sleepover? So you could yell at me and let me know that you hate me!" Julie started off softly but the anger getting the best of her. "Do not blame me for expressing my emotions" Press fought back.

"Why are you here Christen, you don't chase after the people you hate! Or are you here to yell at me some more!" Julie was to upset so she got up and stared at Christen. "Don't you dare yell at me! You have no right, I am the only who can be upset!!! You're a liar, you used me, you never cared for me all you care about is your stupid self!! I can't believe I ever believed a word that came out of your mouth! I feel bad for that girl, she has no idea what she's getting her self into and who's she's getting into it with!!" Christen said now furiously staring at Julie as they both had stood up now.  
"What girl are you talking about?" Julie asked quite confused and forgetting the fact that she was pissed. "Don't play stupid Johnston! Or did you already have your fun with that girl I saw you with earlier, showing her around campus!!"   
"Is this all because of that? Seeing me with her made you realize you hate me??" Julie said remembering the reason they were here. "Fuck you Julie! Why did you do this to me? Why did you turn me into this? Was playing with me really worth it? Did you enjoy watching me fall in love with you when you knew it was all a game??" Christen shouted, which scared Julie a bit.   
"I-"  
Julie started when she felt a burning sensation on her cheek and realized Christen had slapped her and oh my how it hurt. She looked up at Christen and was surprised when she saw......


	4. If you love someone you tell them.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey, sorry if it's not so good but I finished it yesterday and loved it but it somehow was erased so I began to write it again before I forgot what I had wrote. Hope you enjoy(:

Julie's POV

When I looked up I saw something I was not expecting. She had the look in her eyes that I never thought I'd ever see again, I was never fully able to describe it but, it was a mixture of love, adoration, and hint of lust and I felt time stop and all that mattered was her and in the process I realized just how much I missed looking into those eyes but the remorse over knowing that I was the one causing her this much pain was eating at me, "Christen" I tried.  
"Shut up" is what I heard from her but it was nothing compared to her tone when she was yelling at me moments ago.  
"Just....please, shut up. Why? Just tell me why, why cause me this horrible amount of pain?" My heart was breaking while seeing her hold back tears. "I did it for you" was all I could get out.   
I looked at the ground for seconds before looking back into her eyes and I realized just how much I love the color green. I saw in her that she was confused and enraged and I understood. I knew, I knew that I had to tell her the truth because deep down I hoped maybe just maybe she would understand, and then I could call her mine again because oh god how much I wanted that to happen. To be able to kiss those lips and hold her soft hands and run my hands through her soft hair and of course look into those gorgeous eyes. I turned around because looking in her eyes made me too nervous "You don't know how perfect you are Christen Press. You don't know how much you inspire me, when you told me all the things that you've had to overcome I was so proud and I knew that you would get so far in life. You have a heart of gold and it's so pure that I knew I wasn't deserving of it" I turn back to look at her to see if she was still there and she ever so slowly nodded which made me continue, "I remember during games I would just stop playing and just stare at you in awe because of how talented you are, when you scored and for the first time you came running up to me I knew... I knew in the moment that I looked into your eyes that you were the person I would spend the rest of my life with, the person I would have children with and the person I would mediate every morning with because if it was important to you then it was important to me, because YOUR happiness will always come first to me" there were so many emotions in her eyes that I couldn't pinpoint exactly what she was feeling but there were tears rolling down her cheeks, so I continued because I thought 'fuck it' it's already out there might as well say it all "but that also forced me to realize that I have so much baggage, I am not the person that you need. I wouldn't be an addition to your life and I remembered all the times I snapped at you but you just acted like it didn't happen. All the jealousy scenes I gave you, which caused you too lose some friends because I was jealous and beat them up because I didn't want anyone near you. I remembered that time we went dancing and I left your side for a second and there was this guy all up on you and I was furious and beat him up and had the police called on me and I made your night horrible. I have caused you so much unnecessary pain and drama. You deserve to have someone that is on your level and can be just as successful as you are, not someone who brings you down." I saw that tears kept falling from her eyes but now at a faster rate and the same thing was happening to me and I tried so hard to maintain eye contact with her but crying and especially in front of people wasn't something I didn't do but I took some steps towards her "Like right now crying isn't something that I do because talking about my feelings and showing emotions is not how I handle things. I am still not over the death of my brother, just thinking about it right now infuriates me and makes me want to sock something and that has had such a negative effect on my personality and who I am today. I am even less over my mother who betrayed me, how could I believe that after my own mother leaving me for someone better that I wouldn't lose you when you finally found someone who is up to your level and deserves you" her eyes were now full of tears and all that kept running through my mind was, 'If you love someone you tell them. Even if you're scared that it's not the right thing. Even if you're scared that it'll cause problems. Even if you're scared that it will burn your life to the ground. You say it and you say it loud and then you go from there' So fuck it "my life is always filled with my bad actions that have horrible consequences that always pulled you into drama and I could not let my actions cause you unnecessary pain, I decided that if I let you go, you would find someone who would make your life better and would add to your life. I decided that my happiness was not as important to me as your happiness was because you are the only person who I cry in front of, the only person who has broken down my walls and has been able to see who I really am and not who I portray to be. But what reassurance do I have that I won't have another jealousy attack that will cause you pain but I cannot help the thought of someone getting to know you and realizing how amazing you are and falling in love with you and that enrages me because I know how easy it is to love you, how can I know that I won't betray your trust in the future and ruin everything you and I have, I know that we shouldn't try fate so why jump into something that will only ruin everything that you have going for you. So I made the decision to let you go and let you find the person who will be an addition your life and not a burden like I am" I took a deep breath as I finished my unintentional monologue. What happened next caused me too feel the worst pain ever possible..... I watched as she turned around and.... Began to run away.......


	5. Jealousy: good or bad??

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm feeling really excited and I knew where I wanted the story to go so I wrote another chapter and have another coming soon. Sorry if it maybe seems to rushed but I'm not a very patient person.  
> Hope you enjoy(;

Julie's POV

WTF! Who does that? Who runs away after someone pours their heart to them. Who runs away when someone basically hands them their heart on a silver platter. 

I checked my phone in my pocket and I had 30 missed calls and 50 text messages but I had no intention on dealing with that, I checked the time and its 30 past midnight and I was happy I didn't have a morning class tomorrow .... well today technically. I was looking at the gorgeous view from my campus and I felt so drained, my mind was tired. I knew if I went back to my dorm Kling and Moe would just bother me with questions so I decided to go sleep in the student lounge. 

Luckily there was no one in there, probably because it was the first day of classes. I made myself comfortable but sleep wasn't going to happen, My mind kept replaying today events, Christen Christen Christen Christen was all I could think about. This was definitely the worst first day of class, how did everything get so messed up? How did everything get so ugly, I thought we would just continue ignoring each other but I was obviously wrong. I'm not sure if it's a good sign that she was jealous of that girl, who is totally irrelevant to me, but if it means she continues to care for me then at least something good came from that, but why would she run away? then she doesn't care? My mind kept running around in that circle the whole night and as a consequence I had no sleep. 

I saw the sun begin to rise and I needed a shower so I could be able to fully function and handle all the barraging I would receive not only from my friends but from Christen's as well. I snuck into my dorm and saw Kling and Moe still asleep, I jumped in the shower and immediately felt better. I changed into comfortable clothes but tried to look presentable and nice for someone.....

When I was finished Kling and Moe were waking up and getting ready for the day as well, they stopped and looked at me with sympathy written all over their faces, "I know you guys care for me and want me to let it all out, but I just don't feel like it right now, okay" They nodded and got ready and then we were off to eat breakfast. I received a text from Pinoe, "hey, guys Pinoe just texted me that she was able to get the big table that fits all of us and of course all of us includes her sooo" Kling put her arm around me and said "sorry, but Pinoe probably doesn't remember what happened she was way to drunk. I know because Moe just explained what happened to me. I'm here for you alright, if you can't stay there then I'll leave with you okay but we're all friends and you're gonna have to deal with her a lot and I don't know what happened afterwards but I mustn't have been good because you look horrible." Jerk. "Wow thanks Kling" 

We arrived and we found the table but I decided to get food before facing them. I took extra long but when I was starving I knew it was time to go sit down, as I approached I saw them all on their phones but I couldn't see her yet. I set my plate down and then I knew where she was, her head was down and that's why I couldn't see her but she looked up and I realized no one had touched their foods and were probably waiting for me, "sorry I uh took too long, I-I was uhh waiting for them to uhh get the soda that I liked", they all knew it was a lie but let it slide. 

I knew I shouldn't have but I was too tempted to look into her eyes despite the fact that she left after everything, Those eyes had the same affect on me as always, I truly could never understand how they seemed to just get greener every time I looked into them. I was staring for far too long and looked at my food and began to eat because I was truly starving. Everyone made conversation and tried to include us but it wouldn't work, we were all close to finishing when someone came" Christennnnn, Heyy how are you?? I've missed you way more that I'd like to admit" this good looking guy came up behind christen. She must have recognized the voice and stood up to embrace who ever that guy was, "Luke, Heyy omg, uhh long time no see" she said, way to excited for my liking, he embraced her as soon as she stood and held on to her for way too long. When he finally let her go she looked back at me and that only infuriated me even more. I saw them talking animatedly but all I could focus on was the anger I was feeling, it all went down the drain when I saw him lean into her ear to whisper something to her, before I could think of it I slammed my hand on the table, hard enough to spill everything on the table and drop the plates to the ground, that caused everyone's eyes to turn to me. Christen knew this was a bad sign and turned around but I was already making my way to whatever his face is and " Leave. Her. Alone. And stop whispering in her ear! You have zero chance with her! Now leave!!" He wasn't backing down and that infuriated me even more and before I knew it I had socked him in the face and I kept doing it repeatedly. I stopped when my hand hurt way too much, I finally came out of what seemed like a daze when I hear Christen talking to me, "Jules, leave him alone. You're gonna get in trouble" I stood up and look at her " DO NOT act like you care! It was obvious last night that you don't give a fuck about me Christen!" I took off before anything else could happen. As I ran I thanked my school for having the stupid rule that if they arrive at a fight and the person who started it is missing then they won't do anything against whoever it was because that can mean they regret their actions.   
Stupid rule I know but it was beneficial for me. 

I arrived at my spot and I didn't want anyone to be able to spot me so I climbed into MY tree. I sat there and looked at my hands that were bleeding and hurt way to much. I closed my eyes for a second when I heard someone running and I opened my eyes and looked down to find HER anxiously looking around and it was obvious she was looking for me, " you know when you hate someone you don't chase after them when they run off", I said as sarcastically as I could because I was still fuming. I spoke from the tree because I wanted to see if she remembered THE TREE where we first told each other how we felt after the first jealousy scene I caused, where we shared our first kiss, and where we first told each other 'I love you'. My heart skipped a beat when she looked up and immediately knew which tree I was in. 

To say her face was scary was to say the least......


	6. I hate to see her go but I love to watch her leave.

Julie's POV

She kept staring at me with anger written all over her face, at its always rare to see Christen Press upset, I didn't take it lightly.  
"Why do you continue to behave this way" she finally let out. Ugh  
"I am not a child okay, so don't talk to me like I am one, and YOU know exactly why I behaved that way!" Her face softened a bit and I assume it's because she knows I have a right to be upset after what she did yesterday.   
"Jules.."  
"Don't Jules me! You hate me but you chase after me when I run off! You make it seem like your jealous but then when I pour my fucken heart out to you you just run off and ignore me the next day. Then you flirt what that dumbass right in front of me and let him whisper in your ear! You are the most incoherent person I know!" I finish before taking a breath.   
Her face has fully softened and she is no longer mad. She starts walking and I know she's going to climb up the tree. I try but I just can't get over how infuriated I am. She finally reaches me and she turns to face me but I will not face her.  
"I'm sorry Julie, I shouldn't have run off yesterday, it was just too much for me to handle in that moment, please believe me. I would never run off when you let your feelings out but please understand that I have spent these last 2 months heartbroken because you dumped me and completely erased me from your life. You were a complete jerk and it turns out you did it because you are the exact opposite of a jerk. You did it for me, because you wanted the best for me but you didn't realize that the best thing for me is you, Jules" she reached out and placed her hand on my cheek and made me look at her. Here I was staring in those eyes "I can't explain how it felt to be hearing everything you said to me last night, I had conflicting thoughts on the person I thought you were when you left me to the person who was pouring her heart out to me and I knew that you did that because of your favorite quote from 'Greys' if you love someone you tell them even if you're scared that it will cause problems. I knew you were being honest because I know talking about your brother and mom is not something that you do at all. Yesterday was a roller coaster of emotions for me and I'm sorry for running but here I am right now pouring my heart out too. Even if I did see you with that girl doing whatever you were doing, trying to charm her probably!" She said bitterly and she moved her hand and that reminded me of why were here in the first place "you cannot honestly be bringing that up after all that's happened and what I've said!!" I said looking at her furiously and she became upset too   
"Yes, I am. What were you doing with her Julie! Trying to charm her so she would stupidly fall into your arms!!" 

OMG SHE IS NOT SERIOUS! 

"Wow Chris, how about we ask that Luke guy just how much he misses you, because acorrding to him he misses you more than he'd like to admit!! Maybe he'll know just how much he misses you when he's taking your shirt off huh!!" And for the second time my cheek began to burn as she had slapped me again. "Do not speak to me that way Julie Johnston! Is this what it is all about, you're jealous? This has to do with your horrible mood?!" Wow. "Obviously Christen Press have you forgotten why we're even here. I had to witness your stupid encounter with that dick! I have my hand as a reminder that something happened between the two of you! So before you accuse me of stupid things with a girl I could care less about how about you explain to me who the fuck is that guy!!" 

I didn't know it was possible to feel so many emotions again but my emotions where on a roller coaster because again I was furious.   
" it's not what it seems like okay, there's nothing going on between us....... Anymore."

"What?!!"

"It was just one night okay. I was completely heartbroken and I drank more than I should have. I regretted it the second it was over because I was thinking of you the whole time Jules"

"Wow and that supposed to make me feel better! My girlfriend slept with someone else! oh but it's okay because she was thinking of me!!" 

"We weren't together Julie, you dumped me remember that??"

"And I explained it all to you yesterday! I did it for you or have you forgotten!"

She let out a breath "I think we should give each other space to clear our minds and think about what has happened in the past hours okay?? My heart still beats fast when I think about what you said to me last night, and before we part ways I need you to know that I love you Julie, I will always love you and I was miserable after we broke up. If you want to be with me just as much as I want to be with you then I don't care about anything else. I want you to set your mind straight and realize if I'm really what you want, okay" she leaned in and what happened wasn't what I was expecting. She kissed me ever so lightly but oh my how I've missed those lips, there was a light taste of alcohol but they tasted like heaven. It was over way to early than I would have liked.  
"Wait, so we're not getting back together today? We're gonna spend time apart and analyze what our feelings are? We're staying away from each other?"

"Yes, that's the best. I need to know if you're feeling this way because you in fact love me or because it's the nostalgia of seeing me again" 

"If that's what you want then we'll do that but my feelings for you are real Christen. I love you and what I said is true, I see my future with you, I want my future to be with you."

"Then this will be helpful, when it's time we'll talk and you'll be mine again, as I shall be yours. Now I must go because I still have a major hangover and I have Social Psych later on" she said heading down the tree and I followed, slightly laughing.

"I have social psych later on as well. I guess I forgot we're both Psych majors."

"A blessing in disguise. I'll see you later than". She finished while she leaned into kiss my cheek.

I watched her walk and I couldn't help to remember that lyrics "I hate to see her go but I love to watch her leave". I began to walk to my dorm as well. I don't need time to think but if that's what Christen need then I'll give it to her.


	7. Only love can hurt like this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm feeling inspired so a new chapter coming very soon.

1 week later.

Julie's POV

I don't know how I've managed but it's been a week since I've spoken to the girl of my dreams. It hasn't been to bad during classes together because I've had either Moe or Kling to distract me from her beauty. Knowing that she still loves me is probably what has helped me this week and my desire to kiss her again and call her mine. This semester wasn't really busy for me, so I distracted my self during my free time because if I didn't I'd be looking for her. I was currently working on an assignment on the balcony of my dorm room and I had a nice view of campus, the assignment wasn't due for another month but I needed to distract my mind from a certain girl.

I took a break and looked down at the circle where the girls were relaxing and having fun while the sun was starting to set, I noticed beautiful dark hair and instantly knew who it belonged to, I then proceeded to look at the face that came with the hair and I was happy to see my girlfriend again(well not really, but emotionally she was my girl but technically she wasn't) I knew I was smiling from ear to ear because that's what happened when I was looking at her. I stood up so that I could look at her better, she must have felt someone staring because she began looking around until she looked up and caught my stare, she had an adorbale grin and I felt my heartbeat quicken. She suddenly focused her attention to the girl that was with her and I remembered that she was a tutor and that's probably what she was doing with her psych book. I took a break for longer than I'd expected and knew I should return and finish my assignment, I returned to my seat and within 20 minutes I was finished. I closed my laptop and stretched before approaching the edge to see if Christen was still there but the dim lights showed that no one was there anymore, I sighed not knowing how long it would be until I saw her again.  
I was slightly frightened when I heard a voice behind me " do you remember when I brought you on a date here and wooed my way into your heart"   
I smiled at the sound of the voice and turned around, "of course, the best date I've ever been invited on" I walked over to the table I was sitting at before where she was now sitting. We sat there in silence for two minutes before I finally spoke "I've missed you" I reached over and grabbed her hand and I felt sparks but that was normal to me because I always felt them. 

"I've missed you too Jules, a week without you is unbearable to me. There were times I just wanted to drop everything and go find you but I was the one to ask for time so I should take advantage and really think things through"

"And have you made up your mind? I never needed time apart Chris, you're what I want"

"I have made up my mind.... I think we should try and see other people first" to say I was shocked was an understatement. This was the complete opposite of what I was expecting. I imagined that when we talked again we would kiss and id ask her to be my girlfriend and we would rebuild our relationship.

"This is bullshit!! I don't understand at all. You said that after this we would be together again. Were you just stringing me along? for what??" I raised my voice as I stood up because I honestly could not believe this!

"Julie, don't...."

"Shut up! I say it again, you are the most incoherent person I know!" And then it hit me, "WOW! You already met someone haven't you!!" I walked towards the edge and stared at the now dark skies and it was silent but I knew she was still there. "we'll talk and you'll be mine again, as I shall be yours." I said mocking what she had once told me "a very poetic lie Christen! Is this a new addition to your personality that you acquired while we were apart!"

I was too sunk into my jealousy and anger to just forget it. I turned around and saw Christen looking at me with tears streaming down her face "let me guess Chris, you found out just how much that Luke guy misses you huh" I said as sarcastic as possible. I saw her a hint of anger flash threw her eyes and that made me happy because this is all her fault! "He was that good press, to help you forgot the love that you just swore to me last week? I must admit thats impressive" I said as smugly as possible and I reached where she was sitting and moved her chair so that she was facing me and I leaned down so that we were eye to eye. "I've never been with anyone good enough to help me forgot someone I 'loved'. You two should be together as I presume he is as much of a horrible person as you are! I believed you Chris, I probably wanted you so badly that I never questioned the fact that you forgave me so quickly. I regret pouring my heart out to you because you don't deserve the immense amount of love I have for you." I inched closer to her face and I saw her holding back tears and my desire to kiss her tears away almost made me fold, I was so close our noses were touching, "fuck you Christen Press! You said you hated me but now I hate you! Go fuck whoever you want! I couldn't care less but I never want to see you again!"

I didn't know it was possible for someone to shed so many tears but watching her do that broke my heart and I began to regret all the lies coming out my mouth but I remembered why I was upset in the first place.  
I looked into her eyes because I would never look into them again! (I thought)


	8. Chapter 8

Ch.7 pt 2. "I said I loved you but I lied

3 days before.

Christen's POV

*Knock Knock*

"Alex hurry up I need you to distract me!"

"Omg Chris I'm showering, I'll be out now"  
I paced around the dorm room because i wanted to stop myself before I went to go find Julie and kissed her until I couldn't anymore. I've missed her so much and it's only been about 4 days, who knew you could miss a person so much. I missed the smallest of details about her, like the way she would play with my fingers when ever she was nervous, how she would start leaving me sweet kisses all over my face when she wanted me to pay attention to her, and how she would play with my hair when ever I was stressing out over something. 

After just one day I already knew in my heart that she was the one I wanted to spend the rest of my life with and have mini versions of her running around the house but I was stupid to ask for time,so I didn't wanna seem to desperate so I need someone to vent to!!

"Alex!"

"There's no need to yell Press, I've been here for 2 minutes but you were in your own little world."

"Oh sorry Alex, I just need someone to vent to and you're my best friend, so you're forced to listen to me"

"I know Press," she sat on the bed with me,  
"go, vent about Julie. It's only been like 4 days and you're obviously dying without her and I know that you know the truth about her actions then do whatever your heart is telling you too"

"I want my future with her, how adorable would it be to see mini versions of Julie running around, getting to spend every single day with her is what I want, I want to meditate every morning with her and play soccer in the afternoon and if we play for the national team then we'll play for our country together" I said as my heart began to race while thinking of what an amazing life lies ahead of me. "You can say something you know Alex, I want to know what you think as well"

"I love you Christen, I want you to be happy and I know that Julie makes you feel that way but Julie is the world to you right now but maybe she isn't your soulmate. Sometimes we just cling to the first person we fall in love with and don't allow our selves to meet our person later on."

"I don't understand. Are you saying that Julie is keeping me from meeting my person? You don't think she's the person I'm gonna spend the rest of my life with?"

"I just want you to explore and maybe meet someone else and detach yourself from Julie and maybe meet someone better?"

Wow! that hit me hard. I love Julie right? I want to spend my life with her? I know she won't hurt me?

"Do you think that's the right thing to do? I love Julie, I know that for sure!?"

"You don't sound as sure as you'd want to be Chris. If you love her then you'll still love her, but getting to know other people for a while will help you reassure your feelings for her and help you know for sure that she's the one"

"You have a point but that's not what I told Julie. She loves me and wants to spend her life with me, she basically proposed to me a couple days ago. She's gonna be upset when I ask her if we should do this" I said to Alex.  
The idea was starting to grow on me because I mean who wouldn't want to know for sure that the person they chose to spend your life with is the right one.

"I think the point is that you don't tell her, because if you do she'll just tell you that it's not necessary and she'll just convince you. So just tell her that's what you want before you can decide if you want to be with her again" Alex explained while she pulled me into a side hug.

We sat there for another 10 minutes in silence, I kept thinking about her reaction. Best case scenario she would agree and say that it would help our love grow but the worst case she would yell at me and think I'm a liar and never want to see me again but hopefully that won't happen.

2 days later.....

I was happy that I had started tutoring again because that stopped me from chasing after someone, it took away my free time.

I was currently sitting in the circle helping a freshman with her psych class. I love tutoring, it helps me feel help like I have a purpose in life. My mind would drift to Julie every now and then but I tried to block her out. I felt someone's gaze on me, so I looked around until I looked up at the balcony and saw those blue eyes. I knew I had a cheesy smile because that's what happened every time I looked at her. My heart starting beating quickly and I knew that she was the one but I also wanted to listen to Alex's advice.   
"Can you explain this further" that caught my attention and I knew I had to focus on the girl. 

It was getting dark. "If you need a little more explaining just call me okay, if not then I'll see you at our next session" we stood up and went our own ways. I couldn't see Julie anymore so I went to the balcony because I knew it was time to talk to her already and rip the band-aid off.

I heard the elevator doors open and stepped out and walked to the door that leads to the balcony, I took a breath and walked in. I saw Julie sitting down, I just stared while taking her in. Couple minutes later she stood up and walked near the end of the balcony and I knew she was looking for me. I looked around and couldn't help the nostalgia I felt when I remembered the date I took Julie on. 

I was super nervous because I had no idea what to do, Julie was the one who always took me on dates. Our friends helped me out immensely and I'm a super cheesy person so I decided to buy mini soccer balls and place a picture of me and Julie on them, where I jumped on top of her after scoring a hat trick and we both had the biggest smiles, and placing them all around the edge of the balcony and flower petals all on the balcony floor. In the middle of the balcony there was a light blue gazebo, that took a long time to put together might I add, a picnic was under it and inside the basket there was an adorable Labrador that I bought for her. 

I planned every single detail perfectly, I hadn't spoken to Julie all day because I was busy getting everything ready and I knew she was going to think I was mad at her, so when she goes to look for me at my dorm Alex will tell her I'm on the balcony and she'll open the curtain I put and see me standing there with the biggest bouquet of roses. 

It all went amazingly well, we made love for the first time that night and I've never felt more connected to anyone ever. 

I finally spoke up " do you remember when I brought you here on a date and wooed my way into your heart", I couldn't help the grin on my face.

"Of course, the best date I've ever been invited on" 

...................

"I have made up my mind.... I think we should try and see other people first" I never thought my heart would hurt so much saying those words. I knew I was breaking her heart, as mine was.

"This is bullshit!! I don't understand at all. You said that after this we would be together again. Were you just stringing me along? for what??" I had no idea what to say, she was right. 

"Julie, don't...."

I didn't know words could hurt so much, hearing her say all these horrible things was causing me an unbearable amount of pain because she was completely wrong. How could she think I slept with Luke! She wants me to fuck whoever I want?!   
Ouch.  
She hates me..... 

My eyes felt horrible, tears and tears kept pouring down and my soul ached. This is not how I wanted things to go. I wanted to explain everything to her but I knew she wouldn't believe me.

She had forced us to lock eyes and all I saw in her eyes were hate and betrayal. 

What did you get your self into Christen Press.


	9. Fuck her.

Ch.8. "I said I loved you but I lied"

Christen's POV

 

Morgan.   
I'd never heard that name before I met Jules. When Julie opened the basket and found the Baby Labrador, she couldn't contain her excitement. At first she was shocked, which was the most adorable thing, she kept looking between the dog and me. She then gave me the sweetest kiss and thanked me. She stood up and began kissing the dog all over its adorable face.

I couldn't help but take pictures of this adorable moment, she turned around and I asked her "what should we name him, Jules?"  
Her eyes lit up and I knew what she decided  
"Morgan" she simply said  
I couldn't explain the way my heart warmed, I knew how much that name meant to her.

 

I remembered the moment she told me about her brother. it was the day of his anniversary and I hadn't seen her all day so I was worried and when I went to out to our tree, she was there sobbing and it broke my heart. I climbed up the tree and hugged her for what felt like an eternity. She finally stopped crying and looked up and gave me a sweet kiss, I asked her what was wrong and she told me everything. My heart broke as I imagined all the pain and suffering that she had gone through at such a young age, I understood why she still wasn't over it.  
"I couldn't have thought of a better name" I said looking into her beautiful azure eyes.

She smiled and kissed me again, she grabbed her phone and took a picture of the three of us.   
"We make an adorable family, Chris"  
To say I was shocked was an understatement, we've only been together for 3 months and we just said 'I love you' two weeks ago but... The thought of spending the rest of my life with Jules and now Morgan, made me extremely happy and couldn't wait for that life to begin.  
"Sorry, I didn't mean to overstep or uhh m-make you feel uncomfortable, c-Chris"  
I kissed her as passionately as I could "you didn't make me uncomfortable, Jules, we would definitely make an adorable family"

"Promise" she said in an adorable voice as she stool her pinky out at me

"Promise" I said as I took her pinky with mine.  
\----------  
I can't believe it's been a little bit less than a year since that happened. I'm 99% sure Julie would back out of that promise now. It's the beginning of February and officially 2 weeks since my last encounter with Julie, I still can't get over how horrible everything went. 'I hate you' those words keep repeating in my head and now I understand how Julie felt when I told her that. I cried almost all day everyday the first week but now I act strong and cry at night when my roommates fall asleep because if they were to hear me then they'd ask if I wanted to talk about it and that's the last thing I want.

Soccer practice starts today and to say I'm nervous is an understatement. None of my friends have seen Julie at all, besides class where she sits in the back corner and has her hoodie hiding her face. She doesn't eat with any of us and the only reason Kling and moe know she sleeps in their dorm is because the bed is unmade in the morning but she has to show up for soccer practice and that gives me weird butterflies because I'll finally get to see those eyes. 

There was a moment when I was walking to the circle to meet up with a student that I distinctly think I saw Julie with some guy on the roof where we last spoke but when I blinked, she wasn't there anymore. I think that's what gave me more of an uneasy feeling in my stomach. We haven't really seen Kling Or Moe, it's just been Kelley,Alex, Tobin, Pinoe, and Ash and Ali, but we all understand. We would all be forced to be in the same field but we might not have to be around each other because we usually just get together with the people in our position and work together a little bit and that's all for the first day but tomorrow we usually have a intersquad game so that we can see how well we play together.

I put on my practice clothes then tied my Nike shoes and carried my cleats in my hands, they were new and pretty and I didn't want to ruin them. I waited for my roommates to get ready as well and then we headed towards the back of our campus where our soccer field was waiting. 

"How are you feeling about seeing Julie again after these past 2 weeks?" Alex asked

"I'm quite nervous to be honest, I don't know if I want her to just ignore me or be mean to me but at least she'll be talking to me.."

" I've been meaning to ask you, where's Morgan??" Pinoe said as she came to my side

"He's with my parents, I never got around to asking Julie if she wanted him back but I guess after all that's occurred she doesn't even remember him" I felt my heart hurt but I couldn't get into my feeling before my first practice.

"Don't worry, Chris. Julie can't hate you, she practically wanted to marry you just give her time. You guys just have to fix many things for yourself and then in your relationship" Alex said as she linked our arms

"I uhh I don't know if I should tell you but uhh Julie actually asked me about Morgan. She told me to give him a plethora of kisses whenever I saw him and she gave me a bag full of clothes and toys for him but she told me to pretend they were from me" Pinoe let out.

"Aww that's adorable, she's a good person Julie." Kelley finally spoke up

"I don't have time to think about this, I just want to enjoy the sport I love, because I've missed playing."

They all agreed with me, it's been almost a month and a half of soccer vacation. We arrived at the field and stood there taking in how beautiful the field looked after its remodel. It was the perfect temperature to practice.

I walked behind all my friends because I was too scared to face Julie or have her look at me with hatred. We all had to get in a circle so that we could introduce ourselves, Julie was to my right and I was lucky we didn't have to face each other. We were done with introductions and we had to get with the people from our positions and do warm ups.

"Julie!" We all heard a guy scream from outside the field. I turned to face Julie who was smiling and began running towards whoever that was. He had her cleats in his hands and she hugged him as she retrieved them.

I couldn't explain what I was feeling but I was mad and jealous and I felt like I wanted to throw up. I couldn't move all I could do was look at them. I wished I was closer so that I could hear them but I saw Julie look back at me before she leaned up and gave whoever that was a kiss, to long for my liking, and ran to where all the defenders were.

"Wow who the fuck is that, kissing my girl!!"

"Wow christen, I don't even remember the last time I heard you curse" Alex spoke cautiously

"Fuck this and fuck her. Let's practice"


	10. Late night on the pitch

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's been way too long.

Ch.10. "I said I loved you but I lied"

Alex's POV 

Wow. It's probably been like a year since the last time I heard Press curse. She has been overly focused during practice even though its only been light workouts. She didn't talk to anyone or smile and right after we were dismissed she ran to our closet and pulled out bags full of soccer balls and she set up to take shots.   
Weird! It's almost 8 and we have religion tomorrow but of course we know it's because of what we saw earlier. Pinoe,Tobin,Kelley and I all look at each other and knew we should just let her take out her frustration by taking shots.

We were the last ones there, we grabbed our new jerseys and began walking to our dorms. I think I saw Julie sitting on the rail just outside the field but it was too dark. We got to our dorm and showered and I kept checking my phone to see if christen had texted me but nothing. I lay in bed preparing for religion tomorrow because I knew christen wouldn't have time to.   
10:00 pm and christen still wasn't here but I couldn't keep my eyes open.

\--------------------------------------------  
Christen's POV

I've never been so focused in my life. I was probably a bit too intense for light training but I wanted my mind to be too busy to think about her and what I just saw. We were all standing around hearing coach ramble on about what the year would look like and the games that were already being set up but I couldn't care less all I wanted was for her to finish so that I could practice taking shots outside the 18 until I couldn't feel my legs anymore so that I could stop myself from doing anything stupid.

I saw my friends linger around the field a bit more but I knew they wouldn't bother me so I kept going then I saw them leaving and was removed that I was finally alone. I was so happy the closet was stocked with new balls because I was able to practice way more, I thought I was being paranoid but I kept getting the feeling that someone was staring at me but I kept shrugging it off. I was preparing to take my last shot when I suddenly felt this horrible pain in my right thigh and I knew that I was bound to get a cramp. FUCK I'd forgotten how much they hurt, I heard footsteps running up to me and I panicked because it was a bit past 9:30 and it was really dark. I tried standing up so that I could be prepared when I felt someone put a hand on my shoulder pushing me back down and I looked up and immediately felt my feelings resurfacing, I was again upset and pissed off and I couldn't believe she had the nerve to come up to me, why was she around here anyway practice was over a long time ago.   
I couldn't help but voice my annoyance.  
"You're definitely the last person I want to see" 

She didn't reply she just helped me stretch out and ease my pain a bit.

"I'm talking to you!! Leave me alone, Julie!!"

I felt her hand go up to my thigh but very close to my private section and I immediately stood up despite the pain, I regretted it but I wouldn't back down. 

"You haven't called me Julie in a long time"

"Mmmm what does your new boyfriend call you!" I said because I was still fuming about the event I saw earlier today.

"I'm only trying to help you, Christen"

"I don't need your help or you for that matter! Go fuck your boyfriend!!"

"Don't speak to me that way! You don't get to insult me! Not after the stupid stunt you pulled!"

"What are you talking about?!"

"Don't act stupid Press!! Can't you remember the last time we were together on the balcony or was that moment so insignificant for you that you've already forgotten?!"

I gulped because I still felt horrible. "Julie, please just let me expl-"

"I DON'T NEED YOUR EXPLANATIONS PRESS! WHATEVER YOU HAVE TO SAY I DONT CARE. YOU KNOW WHAT I THINK I WILL GO FUCK MY BOYFRIEND!

Those word caused a feeling that was quite familiar nowadays. There was no need to add that last part.

"I CANNOT BELIEVE YOU!"

I yelled at her while she walked away. I had forgotten about my pain or Julie was really good with relieving cramps. I stood there for god knows how long but when I made it to the door of my dorm it was 10:20 and I hope my roommates would be asleep. I decided to ice my thigh for a bit and went to sit outside on the balcony. Why THAT balcony I don't know why. How had everything gotten so messed up? I didn't regret telling Julie that we should date other people because she had obviously found someone and as painful as it was to admit it but I practically pushed her into his arms. During the summer I'd got in the habit of meditating to help me not think about Julie, it was hard at first but now I'm successful in my mission. 

I was freezing cold so I took that as a cue to go to bed. I walked in and saw my roommates fast asleep and I thanked God for giving me such amazing people. I laid in bed and thought about religion class with Julie and practice with her again. Ugghh!   
During these past two weeks I kept relieving the moment that Julie practically said that she wanted to marry me. This is getting me nowhere, I'm going to sleep.

\--------------------------------------------  
I wasn't as tired as I thought I'd be, I woke up to strawberry covered pancakes and all of my friends eating breakfast. A smile immediately formed on my face, " I don't know what I'd do with you guys"

"You'd definitely have no friends and be even more of an introvert" Pinoe added

"Always so charming, Pinoe" 

"You guys would miss me if I wasn't here"

"Debatable" Tobin added before laughing and earned her the middle finger from Pinoe.

I enjoyed that time with my friends and tried to forget what I had ahead of me today. I have class with her and then practice for 3 hours with her.


End file.
